History and The Planning Stage

She said, “Why don’t you come and spend the summer with me at the Funny Farm?”

“She” is Alene, my dear friend of 45 years. 

The “Funny Farm” is a place near Ogallala, NE that Alene and her husband purchased with her sister and brother-in-law about 25 years ago.  Their kids were young adults, their first grandchild was just born and everyone loved to water ski, jet ski and just play in Lake McConaughy. They had a blast and laughed till they cried. They decided that the perfect name would be The Funny Farm. 

Jerry, Alene’s husband, died 15 years ago. Tragically, he had just retired. A couple years later, Alene bought her sister and brother-in-law’s share of the Funny Farm (I’ll shorten this going forward to FF.) Since then, Alene’s daughter, Abbey, and her two girls along with other family and friends have enjoyed time at the FF. Sadly, it’s probably time to sell for a variety of reasons but mostly due to the shortage of water. 

I know Alene loves the peace being at the FF. It’s a simpler life with time to read, garden and relax.  I’m so happy she wants to share time with me at this special place. This may be our last chance. 

Alene was diagnosed with dementia over a year ago. 

I’ll get back to dementia in a bit. First, the trip plan. I’ll drive from Canton, NC to the FF in early June with my 12 year old dog, DanaRiley. We’ll spent about two weeks at the FF and head to Denver for a few days so Alene can spend time with her son Greg who will be visiting from Tucson. We’ll then take a road trip to Southern California and spend a couple weeks with my friend Jeanne. We’ll drive back to the FF and stay for another 2-3 weeks before DanaRiley and I head back home to North Carolina. I’ll be gone about two months. 

I’ll attempt to document this journey every day with our experiences, the joy and laughter, the challenges and what it’s like traveling with someone you love who has dementia. 

Back to dementia. 

As of 2020, 50 million people globally had Alzheimer’s disease, with this number expected to increase to 152 million by 2050. 

Although dementia and Alzheimer’s have been around for centuries and once believed to be associated with old age, it wasn’t until 1901 that German psychiatrist Alois Alzheimer identified the first case of what became known as Alzheimer’s disease, named after him. While age is the biggest risk factor for dementia, people in their 50s and 40s (and even in their 30s and 20s) can also develop dementia. 

I haven’t spoken to Alene’s doctor,  but just from my visit with her last year to now, I think she’s declined. I believe she’s still in the early stage, approaching the middle stage. She suffers from short term memory loss, needs assistance with cognitively demanding activities such as banking. She can still perform common activities independently. She reads a newspaper every day and apparently has no issues with personal hygiene. She spends many days alone with no supervision except cameras inside and outside primarily installed to put her at ease. She gets paranoid sometimes and occasionally has hallucinations that someone is, or has been, in the house. 

She has shown some aggression a few times and has said hurtful things to others in the household that she won’t remember 10 minutes later. 

Dementia is a terrible affliction. 

I want to spend this quality time with my friend while we have the time, before her brain gets completely “crunched”, as she put it. (She told me the other day she feels her brain crunching.)

I’m happy to share our journey through this blog with those that desire to follow. Thanks for reading.